DUNDEE, SCOTLAND—Speaking at a corporate event to celebrate the launch of his news organisations latest milestone, owner of news organisation The Wasted Onion Clef Bozos said that its new website contains every kind of virus and tracker known to the human race. "Our new website contains every virus and tracker known to man. From trojans to worms and even malware, the brand new website of the The Only News Source is filled to the brim with an endless barrage of malicious code that will leave your device begging for mercy," said the owner of The Wasted Company to a room full of psychologically damaged billionaires vying to influence you via The Wasted Onion's journalism. "And don't forget about all the cookie popups that have multiple menus and will end up asking you for payment to not be tracked by third party cookies. Oh, and I adore all the invasive fingerprinting tech we shoved into every nook and cranny of this bloated website, we're going to know all of the specs of your device before you even get past all the ads." Later during an investors call with Satan, Mr. Bozos also mention how The Wasted Onion's new website would force the users device to self-destruct if they did not turn off their adblocker. At press time, senior leadership at The Wasted Company were pressuring its development team of hypnotised monkeys to create an age verification gate to access the website, hoping to share the information with Palantir.