Trump Outraged Missile That Killed Ali Khamenei Was Not Pointy Enough
WASHINGTON—Furious as he was informed of further details regarding Operation Epic Fury, U.S. President Donald Trump was reportedly outraged Wednesday after learning the missile that killed former Supreme Leader of Iran Ali Khamenei was not pointy enough for his liking. "We’re knocking the crap out of them [Iran], I think it’s going very well. It’s very powerful. We’ve got the greatest military in the world and we’re using it. But the missile thing we used to kill Ali, it was not pointy at all, very rounded off, not good, I'm very disappointed about that. I like pointy things, they're strong, not like blunt stuff, which are weak, woke a bit," said Trump in an interview with lesser news outlet CNN. "We haven’t even started hitting them hard. The big wave hasn’t even happened. The big one is coming soon," Trump continued, "But it will take some time, much time maybe, we need to make our bombs pointier, way more pointy. Pointy to the point you can't touch them without getting cut." Before CNN could release its interview with Trump, the White House shared a video to its Twitter page teasing "the big one" that he was referring too, with "In The Air Tonight" by Phil Collins playing throughout. At press time, a U.S. servicemember had reportedly died after accidentally impaling themselves on a missile they were filing the end of to make it pointier to suit the presidents desire.