LONDON—Under mounting pressure to step down due to accusations he misled the House of Commons over how former British Ambassador to the United States Peter Mandelson, who had ties with child sex offender Jeffery Epstein, was improperly vetted for the role, British Prime Minister Sir Keir Starmer announced that he would be firing the entire UK Government over the scandal. "Its beggars belief that throughout the whole timeline of events, officials in the Foreign Office saw fit to withhold this information from the most senior ministers in our system in government. That is why I am here to announce that I will be firing every single person in government, as I simply cannot trust anyone to do the job," said Starmer in a statement given to MP's. "It is simply not tenable for me to continue having anyone other than myself run government. It seems as if every department of the government is lying to me, as I will repeat, I knew nothing about Mandelson failing security vetting," said the PM as he waved his hands in the air in a pleading manner. "At this point I'm worried my wife might be lying to me. Honestly, maybe I'm lying to myself without my knowledge." In the aftermath of the announcement, over half a million UK civil servants were seen exiting every government department building with their belongings. At press time, Chief Mouser to the Cabinet Larry the cat was seen leaving No. 10 with a little box full of catnip, cat toys and cat food on his back as his tenure was ended due to Starmer's widespread firing.