Jeffalo Suspected To Have Ties To CIA, Mossad
THE INTERNET—Causing alarm among users of the social media site, reports Monday showed that wasteof.money owner Jeffalo has suspected ties to U.S. and Israeli intelligence services known as the CIA and Mossad respectively. "uh, guys, Guys, GUYS! I just had this weird pdf file sent to me by jeffalo, wtf is this?? why tf does it say jeff has been to tel aviv and washington d.c. like 20 times this year???" asked wasteof user Esben, attaching as screenshot of the PDF that showed a joint memorandum from the CIA and Mossad, which claimed the wasteof owner had killed a redacted amount of civilians in the Middle East during multiple different secret operations. "Just to be clear, I have no ties to the CIA or Mossad. Why would I? What use could I be of to America or Israel? Do you really think they'd have me make a niche social media site, pretend to be Swiss, garner a few thousand users, and then use it as a honeypot trap to report any anti-capitalist or anti-Zionist sentiment directly to the CIA and Mossad? Come on, you're being ridiculous!" said Jeffalo in a post to his wasteof account in response to the rumours. Further alarm was raised after wasteof began asking users to provide age verification to continuing using the site, claiming the data "would not be stored for longer than needed by the relevant partner agencies." At press time, after wasteof user Burrito made a post which read "imagine if shit was edible," he received a system notification from Jeffalo which claimed that Burrito's post was "personally approved by the Big Yahu."