Democrats Support Bill To Rename Highway After Charlie Kirk Because It Kinda Funny
COLUMBIA, SC—Erupting into an intense debate in the South Carolina House of Representatives Monday, Democrats supported a resolution that would rename a portion of highway 76 to the "Charlie Kirk Memorial Highway" after claiming that it was kinda funny. "While members have the deference to name stretches of roadways in their respective districts, this decision is fucking goddamn hilarious to many South Carolinians particularly in the Black community," said Representative Hamilton R. Grant (D-SC) while laughing at photos of "Kirkified" memes on his phone. "I was inspired by Charlie Kirk my entire life. I looked up to him. I listened to his work every single day. So his passing affected me deeply and profoundly. Wait, guys, I really need you all to stop laughing or I will cry," pleaded Representative Luke Rankin (R-SC) as he pouted and attempted to hold back tears. Reactions to the resolution advancing to the South Carolina Senate were mixed, with many residents believing the renaming of the highway would be a sober, powerful tribute to the conservative activist, while others were snickering and excited to let out a good cackle at the pretty funny idea of renaming a road after Charlie Kirk of all people. At press time, inspired by multiple states introducing bills to rename roads in honour of Kirk, Senate Republicans were considering introducing a bill that would make the AI-generated song "We Are Charlie Kirk" by Spalexma the official national anthem of the United States.