STATEN ISLAND, NY—Picking himself up after losing the New York City mayoral election to Zohran Mamdani, former New York Governor Andrew Cuomo says he plans to establish a government on Staten Island with the eventual goal to reclaim New York City. “The mainland of New York City has fallen to the socialist extremist Zohran Mamdani. I have rapidly made my escape and fled to Staten Island for refuge. However, I am undeterred. Today, I am announcing that I will establish a new government on Staten Island, free of communist and socialist tyrants. In time we will begin the challenge of reclaiming New York City from socialist rule and restore the city to its former glory," said Cuomo before also adding that he planned to rename Staten Island to Cuomostan. “It seems Andrew Cuomo has not gotten the message from New Yorkers. So I will reiterate it - you are not wanted here, New York has rejected your policies and wish that would respect that decision as we enter the transition period. To reassure everyone who calls this city home; I promise to purge and root out the Cuomintang here on the New York mainland, nor will I allow Cuomostan to invade and overthrow our democratically elected administration,” said Mayor-elect Zohran Mamdani in a statement. Soon after Cuomo announced his plans to form Cuomostan, New York Mayor Eric Adams was heard yelling “Adamsland here I come!” before beginning to swim from Fort Hamilton towards Staten Island. At press time, Cuomo started to lay out his policies for a new government on Staten Island, such as a law that legalised sexual harassment and sexual assault.